I find myself at a loss half of the time, sort of like wondering how long before these balls come crashing down. life was so uncomplicated when i was young, mummy wakes me up, dresses me up for school, i think of only school, and food and play. but fast forward to my life now, if i dont get up in time for my morning run, mama is not going to come running to my aid, i am all of a sudden alone not in teh real sense of the world but yes alone, to decide for myself when i want to get up, if i want to get up, where iwant to worsip , how i want to dress and mama isnt goimg to come looking over my shoulder to murmur "dont you think that is too short?".
i feel that i should have slowed down a bit, savoured the moments when mama was on my case, trying so hard to get me to learn, how to cook, how to administer first aid, how to live with people...sigh, is it too late to bask in mummy's ambience?
i dont think i am doing badly on my own, sometimes forgetting that i didnt have dinner, not calling my friends to keep in touch, its like am on a forgetting spree, the only thing i never forget is how to roll out of bed in the morning..but come to think of it, even that is becoming daunting.
this is not a tribute to mma, no this is just a rant by a female who is trying hard to juggle the balls in her life, she wonders if it wouldnt be better to let one ball fall free, maybe that will make this whole grown up phase go a little faster?
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