I had a reality flash two weeks ago when i started to feel a general feeling of malaise at the office and had to lie down for a while as the females (and males) doted on me and tried to make me feel comfortable. i suddenly realised that i didnt really know how to take care of my self! i could take absolute good care of practically anyone but when it comes to me, i am helpless!
i had to go to the hospital to be admitted and i felt so helpless, i longed for someone to take care of me, i had to stay at home for a whole week and no one was there to take care of me, i was numb, all i wanted to do was hide under the covers, at that time my independence was not a solace it was a burden. i craved for company, and love and care. i wanted mama.
the week was long and dreary, i struggled to cook for myself, but i couldnt remember how to take care of myself, i then decided to learn, to observe again, perhaps in my haste to grow up i had missed that lesson, learning how to take care of me.
so here i am on a therapy, a personal attempt to learn anew the act of taking care...of me without mama in tow! wish me luck.
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